JBX: THE BALANCE OF LOVE & LIFE

Good Afternoon Readers,

It's been about 4 months since I've moved down here to San Diego. So many changes have occured between now and then and I'm so eager as to figure out WHY things are the way they are now. I've been focusing so much on adjusting to my new lifestyle that I've realized how ignorant I can be when it comes to focusing on myself. I've never felt so emotional and sensitive to who I am and the choices I've made, especially in these past few weeks. I've learned that you can't deny how you feel, and even if you do, it will show in your behavior and your "everyday" facial expressions.


The Balance of Life and Love.
Life and Love are definitely two different things that have to have an equal balance in order for both to function accordingly. I have failed to hold that balance. As some of you might already know, Jaybe and have departed our ways. We have grown to be so dependent upon each other that we realized how individually different we have become since our beginning days. Basically, Love weighed more than Life. I have invested so much into our relationship that I realized that I lost who I was, the real me. I understand that people change through time, and that other social factors play a great part into shaping a person's traits and characteristics. But our bag grew to the point where we couldn't hold onto it any longer and I had to LET GO. How cliche this may sound, but listening to Britney Spears' unreleased song, LET GO (previously posted on my blog) portrayed a significant message into mine and Jaybe's relationship:

When you let go
Of all you've known
The butterflies fly
And you will see the way it goes
And all the love
Everything will be shown
So let go
Let go

- Britney Spears


I love him. He Loves Me.
We both initiated that our LOVE for eachother is still there. As a matter of fact, I believe it will ALWAYS be there. But for now, letting go is the best way to contain this love. We have an entire life to experience and if we held on any longer, the imbalance of love and life would lose signicance in each and every one of these life events. For example, Jaybe has never experienced the art of dating. Ever since he was younger, he was always involved in a committing relationship. He lost his innocence so fast that he realized how much he has lost as a person. I, too, have a lot to experience and lost ever since I have become more dependednt on Jaybe. I went through a downward cycle from giving everything to a minimum in a matter of years. Time can only tell where our relationship was heading.


We both wanted freedom.
Thinking that moving down to San Diego would enlighten our thoughts and indivuality, only led us into realizing that there is more to Life then just each other. A higher priority for the both of us is to complete our education; for Jaybe to complete his nursing program and for me to obtain a Master's Degree in Psychology. Through this, all the in-betweens from Now and Tomorrow are just as factors that will help us grow as indivuals. Who knows. We both have an equal chance on meeting new people, but that's exactly what we want. Getting to know others around us will play an important part into helping define who we are outside of our relationship. I can reconnect with my friends that I lost along the way, and Jaybe can develop new friendships with his fellow colleagues. Time will be invested more on getting-to-knows instead of having-to-go. Life will be more generated into a whole instead of a part, our relationship.


So Far, So Good.
Since our love for each other has applied into a stronger friendship, Jaybe and I have are still adjusted to living together. We both know that we can't sacrifice moving away or even move back home to LA since we have a life in San Diego to fulfill. We still have each other's support towards completing and reaching for our hopes and dreams. And until the day we will get there, JBX will only grow stronger.



JBX: Livin' It. Lovin' It. Rockin' It!

T-A-C-T-O-L-O-G-Y

Well here it is.

I'm back! It's been a long time since I last posted something worth reading. But then again, it was my vacation. Its been about 2 months since I last posted something about my life. I ended my first season with this blog during my vacation at the Philippines. I apologize for that delay. But since then, there has been an array of changes that has undergone throughout my life, declaring that a new season has yet to begin. Season 2. Where on Earth was I thinking that I should break this blog into seasons? It's not exactly a show on tv, yet I believe that this is the start of something new.

First off, let me throw you a little pitch of what my life is about.

I'm a 22 year old college student who recently moved to San Diego, CA with my boyfriend JAYBIO. I premiered this blog around April of this year and since then, my life has been more of a reality-show website. I enjoy many cultures of life, especially celebrity news and gossip. I enjoy posting random and sometimes explicit pictures of many popular celebrities who I admire for beauty, fashion, sex appeal, or even just a dramatic shot. I am a dedicated Britney Spears fan, yet I'm still trying to figure out about her true self as, I'm sure, we're all trying to do. I also like to travel and experience as many restauants and eateries as much as possible, especially with Jaybe. Since our recent move to San Diego is still undergoing observation, expect many surprises. This is going to be an interesting transition since I will have to adjust from our normal "Hollywood Lifestyle" to the "Sunny Dee of SD"

TACTOLOGY - Season 2

Be prepared for a new and rediscovered season. Summer has dried out and now it's time to recreate and vamp his memory and life into literature. To all of you who have been patient for the new arrival, be cautious and ready for a new trial. In response towards the newly seekers, this is only the beginning into the life and words of TACTOLOGY.

LIFE IN THE SUMMER CAPITOL

Yesterday has been one of the more exciting days of this Philippine Tour Adventure! (I always tend to keep having new names for this trip!) But anyway, today we headed to the city of Baguio! The drive there wasn't bad at all! In fact, it was just about 45 minutes up and up and up the mountain! The first thing I noticed was how beatiful nature can be in this country. The mountains were high with so many green! I felt as if the ride could have been a tad dangerous since the roads were wet. It also didn't help when other drivers tried to OVERTAKE you or when my dad tried to OVERTAKE them.


On the way there, I saw this big JOLLIBEE sign. It was no HOLLYWOOD sign, but it was the closest thing to it. I asked my dad to stop the car so I could take a quick picture of it only because it was so random with no Jolibee in sight! Then a couple of minutes later we saw it...our "WELCOME TO BAGUIO CITY."




We finally got to the top, and there it was..BAGUIO CITY. The first thing that we did visit the PHILIPPINE MILITARY ACADEMY (PMA). The first thing that we noticed were the cadets, with thier uniforms so fit and stiff. We took a lot of pictures in that academy, including one with a cadet who was having a lunch visit from his family. Lolz the first thing I noticed what they were eating was white puto, which all of a sudden gave me a craving. Me and the bro also took pictures in the tree house tower and a statue of one of their weapons. We ended up in the visitors center and bought some PMA shirts and I even got myself a blue PMA hoody! I can't wait to rock them in the States! On the way to the exiting gates, we saw this one statue of those Plume top hats. It was so random that we took a picture right in front of it. Here's saluting the Philippines Military!



After leaving PMA, we headed to Camp John Hay. It was pretty scenic regarding the golf course that they had. It sort of reminding me of where I live back in the states since I live on the hills of a world-known golf course. I basically breezed by and took random photos of thier clubhouse and local buildings and shops.

We continued the Baguio City tour by driving to THE MANSION. We just took some picture from the gate which wasn't much fun, but we knew it was a landmark somehow. Then we drove through WRIGHT PARK which was so beautiful. The long pond and trail made it seem like this place came out straight from a romantic movie. I had lovey dovey feeling for Jaybe all of a sudden. Down the hill from Wright Park was a little place where you could ride horses. We didn't stop by for that but I did take a picture of this random pink horse! It totally amazed me. Reminded me of Circus Circus in Las Vegas, NV! When we came to the busy part of the city, the first thing I noticed was this man doing something that you'd rarely se in LA. He totally defined the word labor. This is why filipinos are naturally studs.

So finally after a few twists and turns I saw it..THE SM at BAGUIO CITY. The mall looked so majestic since it was sitting ontop of the hill. The mall was very grand with 4 levels. The top level was the most beautiful since it had the view of what Baguio City had to offer. We ate lunch at GERRY'S GRILL which was more or less one of the best restaurants that was in the SM.

This was also where I had my first experience eating some kuhol (aka SNAILS).



First I had to sip up the snail juice.



But totally hesitant when it came to actually eating the real thing.



It was actually tasty! I ended up eating 5. Yum! Squish Squish!




After lunch, me and the bro were on our own. We went through each floor going through the shops that we thought were worth it. We even took a picture from the highest floor to get the best view of Baguio. It was a picturesque view, so beautiful in culture!! First we headed to HUMAN where I was debating whether I should by a shirt or jeans. I ended up leaving the store empty-handed since I kept telling myself that I'd find something more worthwhile. My first purchase of the day was at BENCH. The undies had blue crown prints and it totally made me feel royalty! Jk! But yeah..then we continued to OXYGEN where I was going to jeans (again). But I just kept telling myself.."You'll find something more worth it at Hong Kong."

After the whole mall experience, we headed to the streets of Baguio. It was seriously hard for me to keep up with my bro. Everyone walked as if they were driving. I had to literally takeover everyone just to get ahead.

Then we ended up at the CATHOLIC CATHEDRAL. It was nice. We took some pictures in front of it. Afterwards, we headed inside to pray. I haven't attended mass in 2 weeks. So I had a lot to pray about. lolz.

The end of our Baguio trip concluded at BURNHAM PARK. I kept thinking to myself how it would be romantic if I could stroll down this park with Jaybe. We just walked a lap around the park while my parents sat down enjoying the boat riders. It was sort of wierd, because we caught these two girls trying to take a picture of us. I have no idea why, but I hope it goes into a positive use. I also saw a dude walking with a purse on his shoulder. I have a bag of my own and it was rare to see men with man bags. But since this was a knock off of DOONEY, might as well enjoy this for my entertainment, but then again, I'm glad he ROCKED IT! (Apologies to the dude with the purse)



The ride back home was just as beautiful as going up the mountain. We stopped by to take a view from the high heights. On the way, we even took a snap of the LIONS HEAD from the car. I have no idea of the signficance of this monument, but it was uplifting. There was even a little girl who pulled up to our window offering us some gold for purchase. I just told her that I have some gold at home. Sad, but true! As predicted, it started to rain and chances of getting in an accident continued.

The remainder of the evening was spent with so many visitors coming over for dinner. My dad has been living here for almost over a year and has met so many people along the way. Some of the visitors were my dads neighbors. One of them was a girl named, Joy, and we ended the night singing karaoke together. She was such a great singer. When we sang The Gift as a duet, we so rocked the house! I don't know if I'm going to see her again, but I so regret the chance of taking a picture with her because she was the prettiest person I saw so far in this trip.

The night ended with me killing a lizard. I just closed the window before i went to bed and then I saw the body of a lizard with the head stuck in between. I felt so bad. Even though I tripped out everytime I saw the lizards on the wall, I stil felt like an animal murderer!!

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Today was more of a chill day. I woke up not knowing what we'd be doing today. I finally got a chance to call Jaybe today and we talked for more than 2 minutes!! I feel so happy everytime I hear his voice because I know that he's doing good. We ended up having lunch with more visitors. It was more unique though, because these 8 visitors were 17-20 year old nursing students. One of them is more related to us because shes my uncle's grandaughter. We all ended up singing karaoke and it was fun because they were all shy. I really doin't know why everytime we meet new people our age or younger, why they have to be so shy. I mean, I'm one of the most harmless persons you can ever meet in the world! I keep asking my mom why that is and she tells me that here in the Philippines, girls are raised to be shy. It just gets to me that most of these people don't get the chance to socialize with others besides who they're already familiar with. If I were to do something about it, I would try to talk to as many locals as possible. But until then..I'm just living the LA life in the Philippines!

PHILIPPINE TOUR: THE BEST OF THE FIRST

Being here honestly does have its brighter side! I mean, I'M IN VACATION! There were so many things that I've done here that I haven't done at all back at the states. Each day was a new day, a a new experience that I can now add to my list of life experiences. On the second day here in the Philippines, we explored the city of Iloilo. Our first main spot was a place where lunch was served! We went to this private resort called Punta Villa where there was a large open dining room and swimming pools for the little kiddlets!





I even got to meet some of my first cousins for the first time! Theses cousins come from my moms side. Its her brother's (Tito Boy) children, Eric, Patricia, and LA! Umm Patricia was super throughout the whole time we were in Iloilo and Bacolod for she was like an older sister (ate). LA's the rebel! hahah naw shes cool. She just has the hopes and dreams of living the actual LA life back at home. We didn't get to hang out that much because she had to go back to school in Bacolod. Eric is the funny dude! He has 2 beautiful children of his own and he honestly made this trip a lot more interesting from a dudes point of view. Since he's about the same age as my older brother, he totally rocked the older brother role. Here's thier introduction picture along with my bro.

The Cabasac Cousins

Eric wasn't in this picture for sum reason but these were the girls (ba-ba-eh)more close up. lolz.

The next day, we headed to my Tito's house that he owns in the Savannah Villa sub-division. I seriously didnt even know what a sub-division was until we got there. Seriously! Everyone in the party kept saying that word to the point where it became a pet peeve. Anyway, the community was no LA community, but it was pretty nice for what it was. Here's us, the fam, and the Father that helped to bless this dear home..

The Family in the Savannah Villas

I even got to ride on the ever-so-popular JEEPNEY! It was quite an experience. At first I was afraid to be in there, because I don't know how they would manage sanitizing thier seats. But once again, this is a vacation and I'm going all out. I love how it sort of felt like a safari expedition!

Posing with the Jeepney

I like it better in the back!

After our "safari expedition" we headed to have lunch. Getting to our destination was an adventure because our driver (which we paid to have him drive us the entire day) took some shortcut. It was bumpy, wet, and muddy. This was the part where we drove through some community and the people who lives there have it rough. Anyway we ate lunch at another resort in Iloilo. I totally forgot the name of it thought. Crap! Anyway..once again it was nice. We were served buffet style and there was even a pool with a water slide. Sweet deal.

All the cousins and second cousins after lunch

Dont look at me, look at the waterslide!

Aights, thats as far as I'll go in my vacation! I think that was 3 days worth of exciting places and pictures. I'll add more when I get the time, but as for now, i should knock out the lights. It's not raining that much outside anymore! Yaya!

So update with where I am: 3rd day in Rosario, La Union. Tomorrow were heading to Baguio. We'll see whats up.

LIVE IT!

TACTOLOGY MYSPACE WORLD PREMIERE!

HTTP://WWW.MYSPACE.COM/TACTOLOGY

Ready. Set. Go.

TACTOLOGY: Rediscovered

I was going through the day thinking of what I should blog about tonight. I went from anything and everything. At first I was thinking about blogging about Paris or Britney, but then I thought to myself, I haven't blogged about my personal life in a while. I've been digging for the best ideas to apply to tonight, and all I could think about are my hopes for the near future.

So its about 15 more days until I head out to the Philippines. Like I mentioned in the previous blogs, I HAVE NEVER BEEN TO THE PHILIPPINES. I honestly do not know what to expect when I head there. I know that I'll be heading to the many cities and some provinces, I just can't predict on whom I'll meet, what I'll eat, or even what I'll be wearing. It's going to be an adventure because it's in a country I know I can relate to, yet have the chance to discover a culture I'm not exposed to.

One person that I'm definitely going to miss is my boyfriend, Jaybe. We've been attached like no other for the past couple of years and this is going to be the first time in a while, that we're going to be separated. I remember two years ago when he went to the Philippines how hard it was for me to live each day knowing that I might not talk to him. He made it extra special because he did something so creative to help me deal with not having him near me. Basically, he compilated a CD for me with different songs that carried a specific theme which represented a feeling. He directed me to listen to one track on one day, and continue the CD up until the days when he got back. At the same time of listening to the track, he told me to light this candle that he got and read this special tag onto why he chose this song for that day. IT WAS UBER ROMANTIC! For example, I remember one of the tracks being THIS KISS by FAITH HILL because that was the song that was playing during the water show at Bellagio, Las Vegas. It was sweet. There were some songs that were totally random, but added some humor this whole thing. I, for sure, want to do something creative and sweet for him too, but I'm still in the process as to what I'll be doing. Any ideas?

Another thing that's been in my mind was school and the idea of moving down to San Diego in the Fall. We already did our apartment hunting, and Jaybe and I already have our fave, it's all in the matter of actually making everything official. He's going to know if he gets admitted to his school in July, just as I am going to notified if I'll be admitted to my program in late June (while I'm in the PI's). So technically, most of the changes won't take place until I come back. I really don't know what will happen.

One priority I know I have covered is my job. Since this is a temporary position, I already know that next Friday will be my last day. It was so ironic today, because I was discussing with my fellow co-workers that next Friday would be my last day and they were all sad about it. They said that I bring the new-hires together because of my charismatic personality. I guess it made me appreciate time more than ever. I should be taking advantage of the time here, with friends and family, because its true, I am planning on moving. So after I realized that, I now know how important it is to cherish the time I have with my loved ones here, at home.

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New news! My myspace page is just about done regarding it's completion. I deleted my myspace account a couple of months ago due to an unfortunate event. I was going to make this an official deletion for I felt that the website would have no value or purpose. It wasn't until I realized that having the MySpace account did come and handy when it came to communicating with my distant and not-so-distant friends. I decided that deleting it was going to be a huge deal, since most of my friendship ties were connected through the network, and that deleting it would be a risk of losing them forever. But after about 3 months, and with the help of Jaybe and his creative sense of mind, my Myspace page will have it's World Premiere sometime at the end of this week. I have started back to zero friends and will be open to meeting new people, as well as having the goal to find the old and familiar.

If there are any fellow bloggers out there with a MySpace account, email me your addy and I'll be sure to get in touch with you.

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I was talking with my co-workers yesterday about eyebrows and rather or not waxing, tweezing, or threading has the greatest results. We concluded that even though waxing is a faster procedure, that threading has the best results regarding accuracy and having a slower rate when it comes to growing back again. Tweezing, on the other hand is slightly painful and time consuming. It could even be a bit stressful when you realize that you plucked a little too much.

I have been waxing my eyebrows for about 4 years now (I remember my first time was right when I graduated high school and it was the night before I headed to Hawaii with my friends). But yeah since then, I've been waxing every 2 weeks. I have threaded my brows once, but never got to do it again. I know that threading is a little bit more pricier, and also wins because it carries less maintainence.

So what do you think is the best way to get that extra bit of eyebrow out of the way?

A)Waxing
B)Tweezing
C)Threading

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CELEBRITY OF THE DAY
DAVID BECKHAM



He's charming with the passion,
Loving from the soul,
Sexy within fashion,
Kicking for the goal.

My Eyes On Gay Marriage.

I got an email yesterday from KHALELIAN yesterdasy asking me to discuss my opinion on the ever-so-dear subject of GAY MARRIAGE. I was actually at the movie theaters when I got that email from my Palm, and when I retrieved it, I was in a state of comtemplating. What is my belief about gay marriage?. Anyway, KHALELIAN, the author of HUSH AND LISTEN, asked if I could submit a comment on his blog. Instead, I'm just going to dedicate a post about it. Here it goes...

First off, I believe that there are two sub-categories regarding gay marriage. One needs to think about where or under what circumstances is this marriage going to take place. Is it going to be a union in front of the eyes of God, and be taken in a church? Or is it going to fall under the hands of the political spectrum and be a legal issue? I believe that either way, marriage should be a result of reason.

I hope, that most of this reason derives in the form of love. Two hearts, one love. Simple right? Wrong. It gets complicated. Most of the time, other environmental factors affect the union of two men, or two women. There's the family, then the religion, and is some cases, employment can be a struggle. In the structural-social ladder of society, homosexuals are still struggling to be considered "normal people." Many tv shows and newspaper editorials are dedicated to humiliating the gay community, while or even mocking them, stating that it's a "disease" to be gay. No matter where you go, something will push down the gay community, especially gay marriage.

When it comes to marriage, the first thing I think of is committment. Being committed to someone, whether it is man to woman or man to man, should always start off with a base. Base of love, history, experience, romance, etc., Basically, KNOW WHO YOU'RE MARRYING. It's a struggle to try to introduce gay marriage to society, yet another when you are actually the fool, knowing that you are not going to be committed to the man/woman you are about to say "I DO" to. But this goes for anyone, not just 'the gays.'

Another issue that society is concerned about regarding gay marriage is 'the children.' The media has been a key source in portraying gay actions and behavior in magazines, television, movies, music videos (thanks to xtina), which only means that the word "gay" doesn't have to be whispered as much anymore. Children are a great part of our future and if they are willing to accept homosexuality at a young age, I would hope that by the time they make important decisions for themselves as well as for the general population, that homosexuality would also be acceptable.

We're already seeing it everyday: gay senator, gay actor, gay talk show hosts (Rosie and Ellen), and we're still waiting on Clay Aiken! But the truth is, were evolving. The gay community is evolving from the people known as the carriers of AIDS to the people who took over Design TV. So why is it that when the words "GAY" and "MARRIAGE" are in the same sentence, everyone stops what their doing and make a huge deal about it? For me, its curiosity for change. I honestly don't know what the gay community is like in other countries besides the US, but from where I come from, the common population would rather ask themselves, "Should I risk my life by having a gay friend?


Ollie and Jaybe's 2nd Year Anniversary

Now looking at this issue at a more personal point, I do support the idea of gay marriage. I've been in a committed relationship with Jaybe for over 2 and a half years and our love for each other is still growing with new experiences. We already proved ourselves by being domestic partners for over a year, stating that IT CAN WORK OUT! I know that in order for a gay marriage to be successful requires a lot of TRUST and SUPPORT. We all know how easy it is to be tempted by other (attracted) people, but once you can overcome avoiding cheating or casual "hookups" then you're on the go for a great relationship. We also know that it can be hard getting that extra boost of support from some friends and family, but you'd want that relationship to work out, the bulk of it must come from the support from each other. Who knows? Jaybe and I may or may not become official husbands, but we do know that we don't need that official title for our love to be qualified.

Live it. Love it. Rock it.

First Day on the Job

Boy what a day. My day started off earlier than normal considering the fact that I had to wake up early for my first day of my new job. I know I may be complaining about the earliness, but I know when I look back at this blog a year from now, this would all be baby steps.

So my work environment. I'm basically working in a cubical, the standard working place in a business setting. Although I was getting a little ZzZz on the job, my motivation this time was honestly the money. I have not had a job in a little over 2 months and I've been feeling degraded for missing out on most of life's opportunities, especially with the friends.

The people were nice. I sat next to this older filipino lady who helped me out with a lot of my work. Which leads me to a subtopic. Why is it that everytime I meet a new filipino person, the first thing the ask me is DO YOU SPEAK TAGALOG? When I say no, but explain that I understand a few phrases, they go all ballistic on me, LIKE ITS A CRIME THAT I DON'T FLUENTLY SPEAK TAGALOG. Anyway, then she asked if I've ever been to the Philippines. When I told her that I NEVER BEEN TO THE PHILIPPINES, she tripped up twice as much. It's not that I never had the opportunity to go, because my parents go every year, it's just that I've been so focused with school where it would conflict if I did decide to go. And plus, I WILL BE GOING TO THE PHILIPPINES FOR THE FIRST TIME in the end of June. Kapish?

I also met this other fella, a cool guy named Chris. He helped me out with the third thing I had to do today. It was really interesting talking to him because he is invovled in dancing and even knows some people that I knew as well. Since Jaybe is into dancing, we had a dancing conversation and he told me that he danced for Cal State Fullerton's TEAM MILLENIA for a couple of years and still supports FUNKANOMETRY, a dance team in San Diego. And then, when I told Lerissa, who coaches my high school alumni dance team, she knew him too! Turns out that he's a well-known choreographer in our area, and is respected in the hip hop dance community. So yeah, that was cool.

Anyway, I'm pretty tired. I should be going to sleep soon. Oh and my boyfriend Jaybe has been updating his blog like no other and even joined the PLUBLOGS community. Check him and his hot pictures out at JAYBIO.

As for now..goodnighters!

Oh. and Happy Birthday Dad. Wish you were here. I Love You.

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TACTOLOGY IN PHOTOGRAPHY



JAYBE AND ME in Glendale, Ca

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CELEBRITY OF THE DAY



NICOLE RICHIE
A woman who can make fashion an endless journey.